People who know me may find it difficult to believe that I am an introvert, an introvert with an outgoing personality. This is a bit of an anomaly, you could say. We often think of introverts as shy, but this isn't necessarily the case, it's just us group of people who get re-energised better alone, people who need alone time to refuel and recharge.
(Here is the link if you would like to find your personality trait, this is just a short one, there are more extensive ones, so if this interests you a great deal then be sure to do a few and see if they match up and what it says about you :) https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test
It does not mean we are anti-social, sociopaths or snobs; we really just need time to recover from being with people, even if we had an awesome time. It has nothing to do with the other people, it is just how we were created. For me, I know this is particularly true as I am outgoing and when I did a recent strength 'test', humour came out as my top strength (this may explain my sometimes inappropraite oubursts of laughter, one: because I see humour in many areas in life or two: because the absolute disbelief of something sometimes makes me laugh). So bringing these two things together can be a bit conflicting and confusing.
(Click here if you want to find out your strengths http://www.viacharacter.org/www/Character-Strengths-Survey - yes, it is quite long but worth it - now choose one of your top 6 and use it every day for one week :))
So, why am I telling you this? Well, you would think that not working and being home alone would be just up my alley, but quite the contrary. More than the 'needing a job' (well an income) aspect, or needing a purpose, it is that social interaction is important for most of us and according to the online course I am busy doing ' The Science of Wellbeing' https://www.coursera.org/learn/the-science-of-well-being/home/welcome it actually contributes to making us happier. According to studies, what we think we want and what we should want or even need, often don't match up.
Recently I accepted an offer of part-time work and just that act of having a stable place to go, with lovely colleagues and students has exponentially increased the spring in my step. And so I know that I need alone time, but I am also reminded that social connection is important, even for me as an introvert. So what is my plan, well apart from recommending the amazing online course (you can do it for free - the link is in the previous paragraph) start savouring those social interactions both with people you know and (surprisingly) with those you don't, like while you sit in the train carriage, wait in line for your coffee, and other opportunities.
Moving was hard, but finding a church family, being offered some part-time contract work (with great kids and colleagues), being friendly and just going with circumstances has really helped me. Yes I still battle bouts of anxiety, yes I still stress, but I do this less and less. This course and most importantly my faith (and God's answers to prayer) have created a deeper contentment in me.
So here is to forcing myself to socialise a bit more (yes hubby, a little bit, this does not mean I am going to be 'peopling' all the time, mama still needs quiet thoughts time...just in case he thought he should jam pack our weekends), to savour moments more and to actually put into practice some of the examples from the coursera course.
On that note, I would also like to thank God for answered prayer. For providing me with a job, even though it is only a contract, only He is to thank for this opportunity...although I have been sick for a week and booked off work (much to my dismay, but I am taking it in my stride, because Jax 4.0 can't control germs and so I am simply listening to my body, listening to the doctor and using my time to grow my mind and spend time with God)
Thank you for reading you beautiful people.
Blessings,
Jax 4.0
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